Tuesday, December 01, 2009
What? You want an interview? Darn.. you're dangling that sausage in front of me again. You moron! Oh.. alright then :s
G'day ! Please excuse my bad manners, and welcome to my world. I'm Bobo, and I belong to a very wonderful family in this home. They've a really large house, so I've got lots of space to run around in the garden.
Describe myself? Hmm.. I'm short, ugly and fat. Haha.. not exactly the most pleasing description of myself, but that's what I am. My short brown and white fur help to keep me quite clean, and not to mention saving some dough for my owners who have never needed to give me a haircut.
Midlife crisis? I guess so.. Because of my stoutness, my owners are putting me on a diet with the hope that I will be able to shed some weight. Plus, the extra weight is making my knees go bad :s Not good at all. I'd better save some of my dog years while I still can. You humans call that obesity, right? Yea.. I'm not as dumb as you think, OK?
What are you and these other people doing here? Bah... another barbecue ? Gosh.. I can just smell those delectable lamb chops, steak, sausages and chicken wings. My once sensitive nose still picks up all those wonderful smells. Oh.. and on the other end, some deep fried spring rolls and tofu. Now look what you've done.. I'm drooling all over myself again !
Oh oh.. you're bringing those lamb chops into the house? Please let me in.. Damn.. the door's shut again. Yeap, though I occasionally hang inside the house, but my domain is outside here. Sigh, here I go helplessly looking at you guys enjoying the food through the glass door while I sit on the front porch. Where the heck has canine appreciation gone to ?!
Friends? Not much I guess. The other dogs are pretty much bullies. I can't run as fast as them, and I'm one of the most unattractive dogs in the neighbourhood. There goes my chances of getting a girlfriend, though there wasn't much of it to begin with anyway ! :s
Why don't I bark? Dude.. I'm straining my throat if I do that. I mean.. why bother barking if I've no enemies, and all the people around are nice to me? What? Burglars? Nah.. shelve that thought. My house has more alarm systems than the prime minister of this country!
You wanna play ball with me? Sorry.. I don't do that. I'm just to fat to run after it. What the heck is that milk bottle doing on that ugly black brick? What.. its not a brick? Then what is it? ! A Canon 1D mark 3 with a Canon EF 70-200mm f/2.8 USM L IS lens? Man.. that's an ugly looking thing.. are you trying to give me a tongue twister?
Alright sucker.. time's up. I gotta take a wee at that corner. No.. you can't wee in my spot! You guys have your own spot inside the house. Laters!
Posted by brandon at 12:10 am